The secret societies that are now major novels....

The Illuminati

As you may know, Dan Brown's "Angels and Demons" has recently been released in the cinema, and it sparked the idea for an article exploring some of the themes that this blockbuster follows.

For those that live in a cave, or simply can't read, angels and demons is a story of a young historian with nothing better to do than research old and possibly non-existent societies, whose name is tom hanks. after that every other character is either working for a secret society, pretending to, or trying to expose one. then it turns out that the church murdered JFK to protect their massive monopoly on the world cheese market, and that Jesus is still alive, but was mistakenly killed while pretending to be JFK.

Or something

so, in order to educate the masses as to the truth behind this mysterious society, here are some handy facts about the illuminati:

·         The first rule of the illuminati is, you do not talk about the illuminati

·         The second rule of the illuminati is; no dogs

·         At any one moment, there will always be two illuminati spies watching you

·         The pigeon is not, as many believe, a bird, but a sophisticated surveillance device designed to track the population s of entire cities

·         Chuck Norris was rejected for membership to the illuminati

·         The Manhattan project was one of the iiluminati's team building exercises

·         World War 1 was started by a game of risk played by key illuminati members

·         Area 51, or "the clubhouse" as they call it, is where the illuminati host their parties

·         The current recession is not a product of, as many believe, an irresponsible lending system, but a game of monopoly played by illuminati members

·         The Apollo moon land never happened, because the illuminati say so

·         Dr.Who is the official mascot of the illuminati

·         The illuminati still hold the original copyright on "the wheel"

·         The free masons were originally started as "the official illuminati fan club"

·         Saddam Hussein was a member, until he broke the second rule

·         The Illuminati invented coincidence as a means of covering their tracks

·         The official symbol of the illuminati exists in 5 dimensions

·         The lord of the rings is based on an illuminati scavenger hunt

·         If you say the word "illuminati", somehow, Somewhere, a member heard you

·         George W Bush is a member - he is the coffee boy

·         The "illuminati all seeing eye" that is on the dollar bill, can actually see you

·         If the illuminati wanted you dead, you'd never have been born

·         Elvis is in fact dead, not as many believe an illuminati entertainment act

·         hundreds of years ago, the illuminati experimented with genetic modification: the result - MANBEARPIG

·         Jesus was a member - think about that