An interview with Google

Google has recently been proclaimed the source of all knowledge on earth, and in a recent poll, it was voted more useful than ears. Google is surely a figure that has shaped and led many of our lives, and so I decided to try and get an interview with the net giant, to find out how it evolved from garage business to global mega giant.

Me:         Good Morning?

Google:   Kanye west

Me:         I see, so how was getting here?

Google:  Well my friend, I see your face so clearly

Me:         How are you feeling?

Google:  Thanks for having us

Me:         There’s more than one of you?

Google:  There’s more than one way to skin the revenue cat

Me:         Do you have a cat?

Google:  Do you have a cat named Kelly?

Me:         Let’s keep this interview on you

Google:  Let’s paint, exercise and interview

Me:         I’d rather not, I recovering from swine flu

Google:  I should be scared of swine flu if I live in North Carolina

Me:         Probably, I don’t really know about such things

Google:  Nikki Finke hears Chuck is a good bet to return

Me:         Me too

Google:  Cbeebies!

Me:         Are you a fan too?

Google:  Women help

Me:         Really? I thought you had no physical presence

Google:  If Daniel had succeeded in changing the past….

Me:         Then what?

Google:  Clay walker lyrics

Me:         So are there a lot of women? you are pretty famous

Google:  You know, a lot of women get pregnant on their wedding night

Me:         I found that out the hard way, thanks though

Google:  I found a similar situation with Technorati

Me:         Is that the internet based martial art?

Google:  A blend of martial arts and other forms of hand-to-hand combat

Me:         Have you ever hit someone with a computer?

Google:  Have you ever had your modem hit with my lightening?

Me:         Is that some kind of pick-up line? Because I’m not interested

Google:  I'm not actually this tall; I've got this bad habit of sitting on my wallet

Me:         So I’ve heard, does that mean the money is good?

Google:  Chuck vs. Medium, who ya got?

Me:         errrrrrrr…. Chuck?

Google:  No thanks

Me:         Hmmm

Google:  Yoga Hmmm is one of Houston's most popular yoga studios

Me:         Do you take yoga?

Google:  Same place, same anyone you take. Don't go upstairs

Me:         Why not. What’s up there?

Google:  The question is not how she got up there, but how she's going to get back down

Me:         I’m worried now, is there something you’re not telling me?

Google:  The elephant didn't get me, but I'm worried: Now Peter Rosengard is not paranoid

Me:         Aaaaahhhh!! Elephant!!! Run away lest ye be crushed!!!

At this point the interview was put on hold so that the building could be vigorously searched for any sign of elephants, but there were in fact none.

When I returned, I found the window open, and no sign of Google but a note reading:

Did you mean: lest you be crushed?